pteo

Some of the close moment spent was not genuine. The soft talk turned out to be a harsh one soon after myself given an object a harsh moment. It was natural response to the continuous objections. When food shared among friends, it is a friendly way of saying we are in one family. But when food is shared between two opposite genders, it gives the alarm which sounds like you and me are in the same family as well. Things getting pretty hard after few invitations which were turned down straight in the face. Cold greetings sometimes heat up the atmosphere. After dedicatedly being pushed away by the object, the fire in the hall is getting dimmer. Soon, it is anticipated to go away. However, there is something in the feeling still stick to the sweet moments. Everybody loves sweet moments, same here. It reminds me of the green nature forest in a fresh morning with bird's droppings on the leaves. Yeah, somehow strike the calm soul.

what a wonderful world

-------------------***********---------------------------
what a wonderful world.. the brilliant touch from the god, making the world the best place to live in. what are we if we are born in place like the moon? everyone of us will look like Ben Grimm who turns be rock man in fantastic 4. haha.. i never think of watching that movie. not my style at all.. no comic movie.. but spiderman and batman are not bad either. hopefully today won't rain.. was excited to go to the event which so called 'bon oduri'. might catch my breath before i go.. =P wanted to carry on with my work.

---------------------***********---------------------------

******************************************
Quoted "No one can go back and make a brand new start"...
meaning: you can't say you are correct after every bubbly actions and harsh words and act like nothing happenned before.
******************************************
Quoted " Anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending"
meaning: just a simple sorry will soothen one's heart and melt the -100 celsius ice.

*******************************************

lunch in lil viet and dinner under the rain

another quiet and peaceful night. the night that i feel lonely once more. the day is not seems to be alright for any kind of gathering. the stuffy lunch in lil viet is the worst among the worst with those low rated taste food. as the night came along, dinner was served in the rain. was under the roof actually. but the rain was too heavy with strong wind enough to blow my bah kut teh bowl away to the opposite road, to say is makro. really disturbing our dinner. it was fun also. haha. james hold an umbrella while eating =P tomorrow and the day after are two of my few special days in a year. the days which i will make a mark on the red incredible calendar in my purse. to be remembered but no celebration. the were simply pop into my life and push out just like that. tv now showing matrix. the movie that doesn't make any sense to me the first time i watch. maybe my brain is no spinning fast enough to catch those meanings in their words.

new start

did stupid thing again. its good things ended this way. brand new start.. its what people say. relocation to this small island is quite something also. having to earn own income and new friends are just as fun as before. got to meet a lot different style of people. the life is simply fun compiled by a lil bit of irresistability. the eyes look like monkey eyes. =P

GRADUATED

Today is the last exam in my uni years.. It marked the ultimate goal of these 5 years spent. The scruntiny is observed and conclusion is drawn. There are still pitfalls in everything. I refused to divulge the cause of my "worriness". Maybe it will reach insanity one day. After tomorrow there will be no more broadband. The 24 hours access to the internet will be terminated.After handing up the theses with the electronic copies.. everything seems loosen up. My heart smile when the problems are released.. I love ... ;)

thank you

thank you for lending your ears when i need someone to listen
thank you for lending your shoulder when i need to cry
thank you for comforting me at my down times
thank you for being there when in time of need
thank you to be my friend

drama marathon

lil bit hectic. i read for exam on wednesday but could not resist not to watch those episodes.. that's me.. i am uncontrollable. i watched 17 episodes in2 days. the management subject is not easy. brain storming to dig ideas what to write as i am not "cheong hei" enough. how much i write it is just a page.

another day in paradise

i hang around too much this few days.. mentang-mentang present sudah... =P draft thesis is prepared. gonna show it to jafri tomorrow. hopefully,he will not reject.

The reality always passed by my fantasy... =) i gotta be strong.. yeah.. stronger. this not the end of life.. its just the beginning. a lesson of life!! maybe should pity that person for not being thankful and greatful for what was given.. thanks for the music.. it soothes my strangled mind.. which suffocates me all the times..

invisible

i am invisible. hope i have a cloak that can anytime used to cover myself. that time, no one can see me. i can do whatever i want because i am hidden under that piece of magic cloak. i can hit the person i don't like, i kiss the person i love, i can throw away dirty things without being seen and be a free man.

i am nearer to my sis now. she online everyday and chat to her everyday. saw the lake outside her window. serene.. got ducks sometimes. the best part is the temperature there is 13 degree. haha.. how refreshing if i can be there.. and neverthought the sweater dad gave to her really that tiny. dad is thin last time when he went to Italy. But never thought that sweater really fit to my sis.. tight.

today's theme is harworking!!

presentation...

hmm... never ending presentation.. but the monday presentation would be the last in my uni life.. same like the class yesterday.. the last class for this sem and also the last in my uni years.. hopefully monday will go smoothly

aim for higher achievements.. or achieve higher aims?.. ermm.. something to ponder on!was worried half dead on tuesday.. suddenly my pc can't enter windows.. and keep on restarting.. but i was not panic at all.. i begin to think how to save the situation. but at last it was just a battery. haha.. luckily. can use the money for tinted glass!

I am all alone..

I feel so tired.. I fall asleep in the afternoon because the weather is too hot. Did too little things tonight. Wasted the day again! My blanket and pooh bear dirty again. Have to wash them some time.. Both also my favourite thing in my room.

my moments.. 

more than a month to go

had the last test of my years in university this morning. i had done my best although my best effort always don't yield the best result. yeah, optic is actually a quite interesting subject. maybe i will include this field in my job alternatives.

i saw the room i supposed to stay in penang. look quite neat.. although its an empty room (hahaha). maybe what tony said is correct. we are not going to spend much time in room after all.. our time will be dedicated to our work.. but i am not going to do that. i want to live my life to the fullest. i don't want to regret in the older days that i had not play and eat enough. wanted to buy myself a digital camera soon. wait till i get the settlement bonus.... =P

wanna listen to some songs and choose then... got a few cdr from chew ean. will burn them... kakaka... and later on back to psm.. next monday got to show jafri presentation slide already. so fast...

kukup or tioman??? there are rumors people want to organize trip upon graduation.

a day full of hopes

a day full of hopes...
i hope to get a free air flight ticket to australia.
i hope the day will be cooler.
i hope to finish studying optic.
i hope to get my borang 2-1 signed.
i hope to talk longer to my youngest sis on the line just now.
i hope sleep better tonight.
i hope test3 will be easier.
i hope my car aircon can be cooler.
i hope my love ones will achieve their hopes.
i hope tomorrow will be better.

muackss....!!**

about me

1.wat date and time is it now?
19 February 2005, the time is 1705

2.who's at home wif ya now?
housemates

3.did u go out yesterday?
Yes

4.where did u go yesterday and with who?
wang lai and 113 for lunch and dinner with frens.. and jusco alone.. nike factory store with et

5.do u prefer durian or guava?
guava

6.wat time did u wake up today?
7.30am

7.did u go anywhere?
i supposed this is 4 2day.. i din go out

8.if yes. where did u go & wat did u do there?
-

9.how old are u now?
21++

10.are u mature or immature?
a lil bit of each

11.wat do u call ur mother?
ma

12.are u the only child in the family?
no

13.are u e only boy/girl in ur family?
no

14.wat perfume/cologne are u using?
ralph lauren and clinique HAPPY

15.do u use it everyday?
no

16.are u spoilt?
not at all

17.do u wanna get married?
yes.. but not now

18.with who?
you will see it when i wanna get married

19.wat's e most flattering compliment u had received?
i dun remember any.. =P

20.if u were to marry a celebrity.who would u marry?
celebrity wont get married. they always parted

21.when are u going shopping?
dunno yet.. anyway i jus shopped yesterday

22.would u like to meet regine velasquez?
i dunno who you are talking about

23.where do you think your best frens are at?
klang and johor.. ??

24.when was the last time u talk to ur bestfrens?
maybe yesterday

25.do u think he/she needs u now?
i dun think she needs

26.what do u wan for ur birthday?
people i love.. !!

27.what do u want for christmas?
a card

28.if u were to buy any kind of bike of anysize..wat would it be?
not that kind of my grandmother used to cycle

29.if u were a car..wat car would u choose to be?
i don't want to be a car.. if no choice, maybe a small type

30.any piercing on u?
yes.. 2.. each at my ear

31.would u get a tatoo?
maybe

32.how bout a belly pierce?
no

33.how many kids do you wan?
i think should be 3..haha

34.do u have any homeworks?
a lot

35.MSN or yahoo?
msn

36.are u listening to any songs now?
yes

37.do u believe in miracles?
sometimes when there are no way out..

38.where do u wanna go now?
later wanna go for dinner

39.ever been to bangladesh?
no

40.how are you feeling now?
sleepy and tired

man-Q miss my blog

This guy asked me why I write less nowadays. but he has not check the updates before asking. =P this period has been too busy. just had a presentation this morning. i have 1 bad news and 1 good news. The bad news is i haven't finish my PSM when the due date is around the corner. The good news is this is my last ethics presentation. Have to publish the project synopsis by monday. fuh!! And still got a long road to go before things end. Hope everything will go smoothly. This weeked should be packed. We will have optic test 3 next week and assignments to do.

My sis getting married. I want to learn to create multimedia presentation for her. And also looking for soft musics that can be played during the dinner. hmm.. very hard to find songs without pathetic words. wedding has to comfortable and cheerful ceremony. so have to be careful in choosing!!

Bought something new for myself today= RM139. hehe... i think it is the most expensive thing i ever buy for myself to wear. Even more expensive than everything I have.. except those "body ornaments" for sure. =)

solitary

had been playing with my phone's ring tone since sunday.. first time using colour screen.. just like changing a black and white tv to colour tv.. so much fun.. Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring=> that's what i set finally.. so much things to store in mind; projects, assignment, tests, presentations, reports!! the work loads never reduce. sometimes feel like alien when people speaks the language you don't understand. today few people made me feel useful.. haha.. ya.. in ethics class. just now, being "pampered" by a lot of numbers. only an idiot will do what i did.. counting and pressing calculator for the past few hours.. =) i want to sleep now..

happy valentine's day !!

back to school...

back to school.. no more holidays.. after all, i am lagging behind where mostly everyone has done with their psm, mine is still hanging.. =)
how to describe my feelings today?? weary.. drove for 4 hours non stop and cleaned the room.. the journey back was slow and there was bumper-to-bumper traffic once in a while.. luckily i arrived safely.. sleepy..
i have another few jobs to include into my to-do-list.. one of them is to search for wedding songs that can last for hours... tough man... how to collect so many ??

morose

Feel a bit morose today. Maybe i should spend some time alone and meditate. The stupid simulation has taken my three whole days. restarting the pc has been my every hour ritual... hang hang hang!!! but things at home make me feel energetic again.. there is nothing i can't do!! chinese new year coming.. !!~ my mom rang me at last.. ;) gonna free myself from that sluggish position.. =P more and more people left for home already....

log normal distribution

life is like log normal distribution. log normal=ln is to normalize your life... try ln 10, you will get 2.303 which is smaller than 10. similar to our life. whenever you feel very excited or happy, something will shake you down.. by some unexpected event or when you feel extra unhappy, there is still something or someone that will make you smile. the the x axis is our age... whe we were younger, our life was not as exaggerating as we are now. our life now is at the climax. if you want to have fun, try now before its too late.. at the ending of our life.. things will be back to slow and pace. you can calculate and get the mean .. so that you know that is the time you feel the best of your life. for me, i want the standard deviation to be big as i can...

when you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one smiling and everyone around you is crying...

mistakeeee

Home and family situation is emphasized at this time. Going back on friday... !! Been inspired to find a way out of any ongoing issues that have become involved with. I was confused and made a mistake. The data is not available at all...
Gonna create a lil bit of lies... which can make unperfect things PERFECT... shuuuiiiiiii

Wondering who designed the road tax sticker.. made from glue.. melted under the sun and sticked to the windscreen.. tried few methods to remove
1. Just use a damp cloth to rub ~ failed
2. Boil water, rub using hot boiled water ~ a bit different
3. Using the third method. Used the screwdriver to scratch above the damp hot cloth. ~hmm..not bad
4. hehe... use dynamo !!! ~ succeed

I am feeling better already. It's true what they say about clearing the air. If you let it out, and suddenly, you're not nearly as stressed. Isn't that a relief?~
This that has been done cannot be undone. we don't find fault with the people we love.. been packing all my stuff for heading back home this cny. three boxes of books.. and a bag.. wanna take another colour box if can.. to no avail, can't take it out.. no place to put my fan!!

awful day !

laid there for two and half hour for facial mask and eye treatment.. pressed blackheads... whoa.. painful! ~~ =( had a real shockful morning.. saw something that woke my sleepy mind.. faced each other.. and had an awful experience of being a chairperson.. all those awful moments..

apart from that, rewarded myself a blouse~ say a new year clothes. thinking of writting down any unusual thoughts that pop into my mind... by nature i tend to be an insightful person, good at sizing up people, even total strangers. however, today i am more so than usual. Intense conversations, perhaps about metaphysical matters, bring myself closer someone. It is a source of warmth and inspiration.

DOG

In the West, the Dog is man's best friend, but in Chinese Astrology this Sign is a little more unpredictable than that. Dogs are loyal, faithful and honest and always stick to their firm codes of ethics. However, this Sign has trouble trusting others. It's generally quite trustworthy itself -- except for the occasional "little white lies" the Dog tells in order to make things go more smoothly. The Dog makes a wonderful, discreet and loyal friend (despite any white lies) and is an excellent listener. This Sign tends to root for the underdog and its keen sense of right and wrong makes it duty-bound to the core. The Dog's mantra seems to be, Live right, look out for the little people and fight injustice whenever possible.


I am most likely the one having the characteristic in the desciption above. Loyal, faithful and honest~ too honest by saying everything out makes me falls into trouble everytime. maybe something is meant to be secret.. or something is best to be left unsaid... unknown... another hot day that sizzled. even can feel the heat by sitting on that chair in eleven-three.. directed myself to projet later on and had a cup of ice lemontea.. after the cold shower, i am refreshed again. gotta listen to new next time.. get ice from projet and bath in cold iced water... whoa... :P

hug

hug is a boomerang.. you get back once you give.. hug gives warm and wanted feelings. hug someone you love is a gift. hmm.. so how? go hug your love one..

the lonely soul is comming back. i hate reading in my room. its so quite.. miss those moments.. now i am wearing read pyjamas with printed bear.. :) wanna sleep..

CNY mood??

ean already in chinese new year mood although there are still test, assignment, report, presentation on the way.. hmm... busy.. bu zhuang yi dian dou bu neng ah!

worries still trouble me.. can't predict what will happen or had happened.. maybe should just eat the water melon and cool down.. yeah.. bought a watermelon yesterday, and already eaten half.. kakaka... say water melon addict, chocolate addict, music addict, book addict(worm?)..

A Friend's love says,
"If you ever need anything, I'll be there"
True love says,
"You'll never need anything, I'll be there"

chocolate

choc·o·late Pronunciation Key (chôk-lt, chôklt, chk-)n.
Fermented, roasted, shelled, and ground cacao seeds, often combined with a sweetener or flavoring agent.
A beverage made by mixing water or milk with chocolate.
A small, chocolate-covered candy with a hard or soft center.
A grayish to deep reddish brown to deep grayish brown.

I feel chocolatie today.. Melt under the hot temperature and highly energetic in the house. Chocolate is made from bitter cocoa seed that been processed to the physical form you can see in supermarket. The bitter path I am walking through now should end very soon.. Will become the sweet and irresistable chocolate.. with candy inside!

gloomy, hot, determined

~gloomy
my intuition senses some kind of uneasy feeling today.. -gloomy- too pessimistic.. hope everything is fine and goes well for everyone around me..

~hot
the weather damn hot today. marked 31 celsius in the afternoon and now decrease to 27 celsius the last time i checked. the heat could have burn up the mango tree in front my house if it doesn't cool down.. can make people hot under the collar too..

~determined
tried so hard to keep my eye on the optic notes.. managed to capture say, two pages?

probably i should get a cucumber and slice it. put on my eyes.. soothe the dark circle around my eyes

strategic planning?

tired.. tired.. tired.. spent the whole afternoon and night busying with engineering management assignment.. satisfying result afterall... did what we supposed to do except the front page..

how to describe my feelings today ya... can i say "flowerish"? pure and white like lily, spiky like rose, hot like sunflower and proud like hibiscus..

hunny-B.. this is how i call my pooh bear.. my honey.. the furry orange thingy which i hug to sleep everynight.. under the moonlight .. and to that gal that reading this now... go sleep ya.. sweet dream..

Forgotten past..

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches..
~quote for today..

The familiar smell and softness of my blanket provides me comfortable and warm feeling. The weather is going to be hot today. Malaysia which is located at the equotorial always experiences hot, hot, and hot weather. Heavy thunderstorms occur once in a while and frequently at the end of year.. end of 2005.. rainy season of the year.. its rainy inside me also. The hopes and beliefs which I hold to is perished by a little act of selfisheness and hartred. I treasure every moment spent and remember every detail of the conversations and actions. I dream of a perfect and loving future. I want to share with people that I love and care..

tiring day..

Anyone can believe I woke up at 7.20am this morning for tennis? Still sleepy at the hour.. then I was tring to hard to do something useful and not to waste any more time.. out of 10 I rate myself 2. Did nothing.. Went into campus to look for my "choi san ye" but can't find him again. Later the afternoon tried to take a nap after meeting my new group member in P05.. After getting invitation to go apple cafe for dinner, here I am.. writting this...

Mae wants to open a cafe like apple.. maybe she can try purple colour instead of green... just like lavender... purple still my favourite

27th

Is your birthday day 27 of the month?

Your Life
You are sensitive and vulnerable. Tears often run down your cheeks even when the matter is not that bad. This might be the result from being too pessimistic. You might seem cold on the shell, but your inner self is a kindloving person.

Your Love
You will be elegantly dressed, no matter how casually dressed your date maybe. You are demanding in love and sometimes to an unacceptable extend.

new year.. new moments in life

On the way coming back from campus, i drove slowly and a bunch of leaves fell.. very beautiful and peaceful.. It is like a mixture of autumn and summer season.. =)

I realised there's a lot of things in my life that I could not reach. I wanted to be a doctor when I was in standard 3, a woman entreprenure when I was in standard 6, a stewardess when I was in secondary.. but I turned up studying in this place.. haha! What can I say, 5 years are going to end. I have another 3 months to complete everything and start working.. but working in that organization is not my choice after all.. a design engineer..

The past few months had been very intriguing.. a simple word to define my inner thinking. I gave my heart wholly and thought of nothing else. But everything was not in my hand.. gripped too firm?

I have my new year resolution.. that is to be affable..